Day 28 – Lost in Place

Meditate. ✖

Exercise. ✅
Cardio Sports Drill workout on Daily Burn.

Write. ✅
I don’t want to go to work tomorrow. My nerves are fine and I’m not really feeling that anxious, but I am feeling quite a bit of dread at the thought of having to go to work. I was finally starting to get to a place where I was almost happy going to work. Now, I’m feeling some of the angst that I used to feel before. I’m trying to stay mindful and not let myself get carried away, but when I imagine myself having to deal with everything again tomorrow, I just feel exasperated.

I actually had a really nice weekend in spite of everything that happened last week. I’m already looking forward to next weekend. I guess that’s not that different from how I usually feel. Is this what my life is going to be like? Just waiting for the next weekend to come around? What about all the life in between that will pass me by? I’m starting to feel more anxious about that question…what am I going to do with my life? Truth be told, minus the current setback, I’m content with my life where it is, but there’s a sense of fulfillment that’s missing. And I know that it won’t be enough for me in the long run. But, I just can’t figure out what I want to do. I have some ideas, but I really question whether I can make that a reality (self doubt is still a leading mechanism in my life). And if I can’t, what then? I feel like I’m lost in a place that I know really well. I’m trying to be patient, but I can’t wait forever. What am I even waiting for?

Do not go out to drink. ✅

Do not eat garbage (fast) food. ✅
Carne Asada Burrito
Carne Asada Tacos
Pizza
Flamin’ Hots

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