It upsets me the most when people I particularly dislike and have no respect for think of me the wrong way (in most cases, these are people I work for…I’m pretty good about not surrounding myself with people I don’t like or respect). Their misperception of me drives me crazy to no end. I churn their words in my head over and over again, triggering each time a set of negative emotions as well as uncomfortable physical responses. The thought creeps up and my lips immediately twist into a frown and my eyes roll back with a sharp twinge of disdain. I’ll soon catch myself and tell myself the usual platitudes:
“It’s okay, who cares. They’re fuckin idiots, what does it matter.”
When I’m a little more aware than usual, I’ll just start observing myself and my thoughts. I think perhaps what I need to do, or more specifically remember, is the illogic behind being so upset:
These are people I do not respect. I do not think they are very smart or aware of reality and therefore do not really value their opinions. Then why am I getting so upset about what they think about me? These are people with no real grasp on what is actually happening in the real world. That’s one way to go.
Or maybe they’re not such dipshits. Who can say that their impression is wrong? There are truths to some parts of what they say…or in the case of inaccurate interpretations, I can see why they would think that upon analysis of my own actions. So basically, there are two options and they both work to my benefit – not just in “winning” or “being right,” but for my actual self-improvement:
- It’s silly to get upset over the opinions of people you do not respect. Don’t pay heed to their criticisms because it is based on a narrow screen that only sees a slither of what is really going on.
- Pick out the points that are true and accept that your actions (note the use of “your actions” as opposed to “you” – these actions may not be reflective of who you truly are) are giving off these impressions. Stand by the parts you believe in and take action to properly adjust the parts that can cause incorrect interpretations.
Remember, that when dealing with bosses there are certain politics of power involved that cannot be avoided. If your boss is indeed an idiot, or an egomaniac, then why would you expect him/her to ever understand anything you have to say? He’s never going to really hear anything you have to say as long as it doesn’t align with his ingenious conclusions.